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Hope and Light

Things that were once so simple become mountains of impossibilities. Something as easy as rinsing dishes change in our eyes to a rushing flood of torrent rains. Laundry is the Swiss Alps. Cooking is a brunt pan on the stove because we forgot we were cooking. Driving is not advised. The mind wonders and you can’t remember how you got from point ‘A’ to point ‘Z’ and you freak. Normal thought does…

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Between Two Worlds

The one thing in life that we cannot really wrap our minds around is death. Yes, we know all things die and eventually, we will too, but in our hearts, we don’t believe that. From birth, we think we are forever and in some ways we are. Forever in the minds and hearts of those who love us until they pass. Forever in whatever our beliefs may be. Yet, we cannot conceive of the death of those we…

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It Only Takes a Moment

It Only Takes a Moment

Did you turn a blind eye, over those long terrible years and not see what was in front of you? Did you turn your back when you were most needed and then, you wonder why? I’ll tell you why, the short part of a long history. I’ll tell you, but, once again, you won’t listen. You will turn your back, once again.

It started well enough, hidden behind the mask. No one, absolutely no one, saw it in the…

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10 posts!

10 posts!

A Higher State of Being

A Higher State of Being

At the stroke of death, most of those left behind become different, changed. We see everything different, think different, feel different, react different. I don’t know if it is a permanent change or only lasts through the deepest of the grief. I don’t know if it is a tool that occurs to protect us, teach us, make us more aware, all of these things. We do become more aware though. Almost too much…

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Can You Read the Signs

Can You Read the Signs

To love deeply, we become more and less then who we were. Where once we were one, we become part of someone else. We become mom, dad, sister, brother, lover. When that love is taken from us, we lose ourselves. We lose who we think we are. That loss is devastating. We become mired in wondering who we are for we think we have become nothing. Am I still a mom, dad, sister, brother, wife to the one…

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Forgiveness?

Sigh, this is not a ‘feel good piece’ about how you should forgive for your own sake. Forgiveness is a tricky bird. You can say you forgive and find out later that deep in your heart, the blame rages on. To be honest, I do not get ‘forgive’ and set yourself free. For some people, they need to do that. For me, not so much. For years, I have forgiven others their transgressions against me, always…

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Moments of Normal

Yeah, I found that hard to believe too. Normal is not a word that comes to mind in the world we now live in. Normal was calling or getting messages from Tim, daily. Normal was so many things that have passed beyond me now. With him gone, me, who I was, what I was, what I could of been, were gone. I had become something else, someone I did not know and had no wish to know. Not just half a person,…

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5 posts!

5 posts!

Hind-Sight

In the early days, the ‘what if’s’ torment us as much as the event itself. We think, rethink, and over think. What if there was some small thing we could have done different that would have changed the out come. It is common now, for us to play this game. But to do so will only make our grief deeper if that is possible. We held in our hands the ability to prevent something and did nothing? Is…

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